The discussion about viewing cruel family members/abusive relationships/etc. who are seemingly "bad" elements in our lives, as "teachers" in our lives rather than objects to be avoided reminds me of Carlos Castaneda's teachings. He--or, rather, Don Juan--calls such elements in our lives "little tyrants." And to Castaneda/Don Juan, one should celebrate finding your "little tyrant" for it is your true teacher who will challenge you and bring you to a higher awareness. I believe there is such a concept in Buddhism, also, but cannot right now think of it off the top of my head (that may be the blame of the IPA(s)).

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steph

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"I wasn't going to spend my life doing what had already been done." - Georgia O'Keeffe
"Find out who you are and do it on purpose." - Dolly Parton